I don’t know about you, but I’ve always been fascinated by the use and abuse of the English language.  And, it comes in so many different forms.

Road Signs

Road signs are great places to find fascination.  Some of my favorites:

In Michigan, I lived near a school that trained dogs to become the eyes for blind people.  In Michigan, they’re called Leader Dogs.  The yellow diamond warning sign on the road approaching the school announced:

• Watch for Blind Leader Dog School

Which, of course, set me to wondering:  if the dogs are blind, what possible help can they be?

If you are driving between two towns in some places of the Northeast, like Boston, when you are nearing the next town, you’ll see road signs that say:

• Thickly Settled

So, what does that mean?  I mean, you can somewhat assume they mean you’re entering the next town, but who came up with Thickly Settled?  Does that mean Watch for Pedestrians, or Speed Trap Ahead, or are all the residents of the town a little overweight or perhaps not too bright?

Newspaper Ads

One of my recent favorites was the job posting I saw in a community newspaper.  This company was recruiting:

• 3-Year Old Teaching Assistants

Yes, you got it.  I started wondering what ever happened to the child labor laws?

Motel Signs

Ever notice the signs outside of motels that try to draw in weary travellers by touting the wonders awaiting the weary?  Some places boast of their cable tv or in-room movies, free local calls, etc.  Then, there was the rather well-used little motel I passed one day somewhere in the wilds of Michigan.  The sign outside said:

• Furnished Rooms

And, I thought, gee, if having a bed and a chair in the room was my only claim to fame, I don’t think I’d put it on the sign out front. 

Now, do you think they rented rooms by the week or month?  Maybe.  I have always had more fun assuming that the owners were just particularly unimaginative.